Twelve Years Old
Unlovable
That’s what I’ve believed all these years
I am unlovable
Wall so tall, hard demeanor
No one could possibly love me
And yet
Precious baby girl bouncing in my lap
Her eyes filled with love
For me!
To her I am her hero, her protector
Her guardian angel
Twelve years old my innocence was lost
Forever altered
Missing something
Missing everything
Questioning all things
Seeking anything
No one heard me?
Who will save me?
I am unlovable
Laughter, friends, uncertain future
Innocent love
Protection, protector
Happy & positive, twelve year old girl
Shoved in a closet
Bound with rope
She is never getting out
Is she?
Wanting to be found
Heart ache to mend
To grieve
To share… her story
She has something to say
And yet…
Fear
Quiet cup of coffee
One lump in throat
Mom- I have something to tell you…
When I was twelve years old…
Tragic story told… Released
Mending showed up
Peace
Love
Fear abandoned
I AM loved
I AM needed
I AM wanted
I AM watched for
I AM released
Throwing open the closet door
Twelve year old girl has flown
Rope coiled on the ground
Like a dead snake
Loved
But you have to tell
Your story
And get help
Jeni McCreary
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1 in 4 women/girls in the US will be victim to rape, a 25-26% chance in their lifetime. I wrote this for those whose stories haunt me and for those I haven’t met yet… our dear mothers, daughters and sisters that have so much baggage and who have gone through so much. Rape changes a person, fear cripples feeling that you have little or no support. While some may not see their own value I hope one day they will. Their tough demeanor, so hard to crack….simply need to know that they ARE loved, needed, wanted, and watched for. Recognize it now, your value, your future calling you forward. Throw open the closet door and know… you ARE loved!
strengthdefined 