Blue

Blue The Color of… 

The sky

Glaciers

Sea glass

Peacocks

Blue bells

Lanterns

Ocean

Nail polish

Walls

Blue the color of emotions…

Melancholy

Sadness

Tears

Turbulent

Transcending through multiple shades

And layers

Of blue

Laughing

Crying

Wandering thoughts

Route back to you 

Letting go is blue

Healing wrapped in a warm fuzzy blue blanket

Blue crayons draw blue hearts

Mourning you, Mourning me

Dark eyes look in the mirror, wanting only peace

Peace is vibrant robin egg blue 

I’ll find you there

Happy 

Melting into blue lapis

Sun shining in the crisp 

Blue sky 

 

Words to my year ago self

You are awesome

You are going to do great things

You are strong

You are able

You embraced challenges

Started your 1/2 sleeve

Watched your daughter learn and grow

Be there for her, but let her make those hard decisions

And own them

You were brave

Remember not to get wounded in the little things

Let things go more

Pick your battles better

Seek first to understand

Your listening has gotten better

Do more of that

Stop the echo in your head that says, “I can’t”

Your “can’t” kept you hostage for too long

Let “I can’t” be more of, “I CAN”

You put in the work

You found courage

Keep listening to your instincts, no doubting

Learn

Seek forgiveness from others & yourself

Stop rutting

Stop wallowing

Keep moving forward

Find peace

Pray more

Laugh more, daily on the regular

Tell your family & friends how much you love them

Continue to seek joy in the little things

Stop being so hard on yourself

Relect on how far you’ve come

Stay passionate

Rock steady

Keep learning

Set bigger goals

Believe in yourself

Get more sleep

Keep writing

Be open

Be honest

Be transparent

When tough days come- get back up

Cry

Own your pieces & parts

Reflect

Change what you can

Heal

Find peace

Stay in your now

 

 

Time

Repentance to others takes time

Often it’s never enough

Wounds are too deep

For others to accept

Salt water may cleanse the wound 

But healing takes patience & time

Time we don’t have

Imagination is worse than reality

Yet reality can’t be heard

Or processed

Leaving wounds open

Picking at wounds never help 

Picking at scabs when close to healing 

Opens everything again

Prayers go up

And up

And up

And up

Where is the faith? 

Lost it along the way? 

No repentance will offer resolution 

Or acceptance

Or forgiveness

Maybe forgiveness comes 

In just letting go

Of the wounds?

Of each other? 

Of the past?

Of the hurt?

Acceptance that things will never be the same again 

Regardless of forgiveness 

The decision that it is done 

Done done

When do the wounds heal?

What makes repentance meaningful?

When does healing come?

Mentally?

Emotionally? 

Physically?

Let go and let God?

Easier said than done 

Wounds ooze as they heal 

The process takes time

Time is something we don’t have 

Or do we?

You

Will

When

You’re

Ready

Time

Unmovable

Set your mind to it

Whatever your IT is

Make a plan

Get to stepping

Life will derail you

Stay unmovable

Know where your strength comes from

Be honest with yourself

Vocalize your dreams, your goals, your plans

Heal 

Inside & out

Topple over- get back up

You are unmovable

You can do this

You are more than you give yourself credit for

Get help

Find courage

Be Brave

You’ve got this

No fear

See joy around you, but grab some for yourself

It’s ok to cry… let it out and let it go

You are unmovable 

And awesome

You can

You will

You are

There is a hope and a plan for your future

And it is good

Rock solid

Unmovable 

Only Guests

Humidity over 110%

Blue sky

Puffy white clouds

Mouths open in awe

Taking it all in

Architecture

Cuban cigars & smoke

Everywhere

Cobblestone streets hundreds of years old

Pimp in green shirt

Has right boxing ear

Fast talker

Encourages us to go to hidden location

Goods 50% off

Our brave leader disappears 

With a local panhandler to look at cigars

We stand in the heaviness 

Of a local alley 

Reminded that we don’t belong here

Only guests traveling through

Locals stare, unwelcome faces

Some swear at us in Spanish

Some curse us

Others cat call our beautiful teenagers

Mamas on guard ready to scrap

Stern local police with shot guns

Stare at us like we’re crazy

I believe we may be 

The only guests traveling this ally

We surely took a wrong turn

Leader asks police for picture 

Now they’re contemplating sending 

Crazy Americans to jail

Coffee or shotgun

We choose coffee sprinting away

Dogs with ribs jut out

Running the streets mangy & hungry

They seek solace with us

The pet loving Americans

Santeria priests & priestesses everywhere

Unnerving everyone 

Oh the Cuban coffee smells divine

Beautiful cafes 

Ropa vieja   

Black beans & rice

Mangy kitty with a heart in fur welcomes us to fine dining in the rain 

Salsa music

Maracas

Pregnant women asking for milk for their babies

Havana rum

Mojitos

Fairy forest in the city that is surreal 

Locals every color, eyes vary & stunning 

Not much joy in many of those eyes

An occasional smile 

Old sexy cars in a time warp

The best of the city feels harsh yet beautiful 

Rustic doors, metal work

Laughter with friends & family 

Sweating from the heat

Wet from the rain

We are guests that don’t really belong 

But honor our incredible surroundings

Beaming in simply being together

Catching glimpses of all the beauty & nuances that make up this incredible city of Havana, Cuba (7/12/18)

photos: H. McCreary

Havana in the Rain

Havana in the Rain

Torrential down pour

Tourists hide in alcove 

A run down hotel

Mid-renovation, can’t go in

Steamy hot at 9 o’clock am

Now cold wind 

Whipping rain pellets

On tender skin

Local children without running water

Sprint to the plaza 

Jumping into the fountain 

Belly flops

Cannon balls

Tourists on their feet whooping

In merriment- this is living

Standing ovation 

For a brave little boy

Displaying amazing freedom 

He grins at the accolades 

Crazy Americans 

His smile blinding

He races across the plaza

Every mother holds their breath

Worrying as if he were their own

His courage and uninhibited flop

Inspiring

If only we could be that fearless

A grandmother grabs her granddaughter 

They dance and splash in the rain

Lightening cracking around them

Their laughter ringing in every ear 

Watching, shivering, grinning 

Oh to be spontaneous

How often are we really that uninhibited?

That free? 

Joy comes in the little things

Like a little boy jumping in a fountain

Cannonball 

A grandmother stomping in puddles with her granddaughter

A torrential down pour

Beautiful Havana in the rain 

Pure joy 

Soak it in

Repeat

(Havana, Cuba- 7/12/18)

Uncomfortable

Get comfortable

Being uncomfortable

Stretch yourself

Do things you’ve never done

Stay open and vulnerable

20 seconds of courage

Is all it takes

You are not weak

Nor a victim

Your life matters

You make a difference

You can do anything

You set your mind to

Even if it’s uncomfortable

Do it anyway