I reached for you
In my dream
But you were gone
I heard you call my name
But in the darkness
I could not find you
I pleaded for you to appear
But you didn’t
I fell to my knees
In anguish
Lost
I felt a warm blanket
Fold over my shoulders
I cried into its softness
Until I had no more
Tears to cry
Acceptance of my now
In that moment
Peace arrived
I knew from deep within
That everything
Would be just fine
I felt your breath on my lips
Our lips barely touched
If only in another life
We were meant for each other
JJ McCreary
Photo credit: Incitydaily.in
Constricted chest feeling like
The weight of a 1000 pounds
Unable to breathe
Hospital admission times two
Necessary bone marrow test
Leukemia?
How could this be?
Not to me
She needs me God… please
Don’t take me, not yet
She clung to me after the test
My back and pelvis throbbing
Excruciating
I didn’t want to move her
Her napping drool pooled
On top of my spotted blue hospital gown
The pain vibrated
Trying to reach my call button
Her eyelashes caught my attention
Peacefully she slept on my chest
The pain melted away
Into the beauty of her face
Calm hushed like a roar in
The hospital room
In that moment I knew
I would live
For her
For me
For us
*2015 journey of the leukemia scare that took 6 months to rule out
They stare at me
And I back at them
Two texts
Last ones ever sent
Never to receive again
Two beautiful and important
Women in my life
Mom #1 & Mom #2
They taught me
Independence
Strength
Determination
I miss their advice
Their laughter
Their perfume
Two women that altered
My trajectory
Forever
So I hold on to two texts
As a reminder
To love
To live
To feel
To grow
To learn
Two women who molded
Me
Two texts
She thought she stood alone amongst opposing forces, but quickly realized her tribe’s presence was felt. She knew that she was never going to be alone.
JJ McCreary
Sometimes our love & belief in others is enough to carry them to and through to believe in themselves. Isn’t it a bummer that many of us trip up in not believing in ourselves?! Why do we do that?
Listen carefully… you are enough! Grab the bull by the horns, go slay your giant, climb that mountain…. know that you can do ANYTHING you set your mind to. The time is now, not tomorrow. Now.
Oh and if it helps… I love you.
#findyourtribe #loveunabashedly #iloveyou #youareenough
