Nothing Saved

We are made from the same cloth

You and I

We struggle through the day-to-day

Knowing we are meant for more

But life is hard

Exhausting

Emotionally taxing

Energy depleted

With nothing left to give others

Let alone ourselves

Or to our destiny

Our soul taps its feet

Arms crossed, staring glare

This is all we’ve got?

Really?

We wake up undone

An urgency

We have no idea

What to do or where to start

We hunt and search

For all the wrong things

Wrong avenues

Wrong directions

Feet still tapping, same staring glare

Like a drum

Urgency thunders within

But we spin in circles

Frustrated

Left alone in spooling thoughts

Is this how we’ll be remembered?

A life semi-lived?

Soul staring, head shaking no

If we die today

Have we left a mark?

Of a life fully given

Nothing held back

Refusing to settle for average

Did we give up on ourselves?

Did we give up on God?

Aren’t we warriors?

Legends who decide

To rise up & push forward

Leaving our life with nothing undone

No regrets

Urgency channeled

Through Him

Nothing saved

Not My Son

Police radios blaze
Shots fired Shots fired
Two officers down
Two down
Angry panic over radio waves
Phone rings
Sarg- we don’t know if it’s your son
Line gone
A dash to call whoever can say it
Is it my boy?
Is it my son?
Sir we don’t know yet
Life flight on way- you can come identify
If it’s your son – We don’t have names yet
Police radio crackles again
A sad voice illuminates the night
Can someone tell me where is my husband?
Silence in the night as breaths are held
And released in cursing mutters under breaths
Sarg! It’s not your son
Relief
But other sons are gone
Two warriors
Gone in less than
Four minutes
A blink or two
Four children
Two Wives
Senior in high school
They are gone
Never to be held or touched
Again by their Daddies
Female detective
Lost her soul mate
Four children- youngest only 8 months old
Who will never remember Daddy’s breath when he gives kisses hello
And kisses goodbye
Brothers in blue
Mourning
Each of you
The guilty relief
It was not my son
But they were someone else’s sons
Mother dashes on a plane to decide to
Take him off life support
What thoughts went through her mind
Hoping it was a bad dream & that
She’d walk in his room & he’d be smiling
At her
Surely it can’t be my son
Not my son
Community leaders
Heros
Warriors
Selfless men
Who loved their jobs
Their families
Their friends
Gone
But not forgotten
Their legacy goes on
Beckoning those left behind
As a reminder
To not stop
To engage
To love
To laugh
To make a difference
To be in the moment
In our communities
Because there we will find
Sons who need us
And a reminder
That life is precious
So we better live it
And live it well

Jeni McCreary

 

 

CHAMELEON

Chameleon
Your colors
Camouflage
Offer Protection
Make you
Relatable
To your environment
Always changing
Always Morphing
What is your true color
Chameleon?
Have you ever been
Your true color
For any
Length of time?
Adaptable
Stealthy
Your colors
Continue to change
For every situation
You’re in…
I wonder
Chameleon
What is your
Favorite color?
Do you ever stay in it
For very long?
Are some colors
Easier to slide into?
Ever get tired
Chameleon
In not staying
In your authentic color?
Or do you even realize
That your colors change?
Never really knowing
Your true color
Authenticity
Lacking
But you are beautiful
Chameleon
It’s dreamy how
You so easily
Change
Adapt
And master each
Encounter
With the color
Of your surroundings
Thank you
For the show
And the bit
Of time
Your color
Matched my own
We blended
For a minute
But I blinked
You were gone
A different color
Against the
Background
Of your chosen
Path
Gone
I don’t see you anymore
Against the Camouflage
Of the color
You now call…
Home

Perfect One

Just somebody

Is not your body

To love

Or purpose

They were not meant

For you

Just a some

Body

Your body was

Meant for the

Perfect one

The only one

But you rush

The loneliness

Creeps in

Rather than

Seek the

One

Who can fill that

Loneliness

You chose to

Awaken

The wrong one

Shhhhhhhh

Just listen

Hiding what is

In the dark

Must come to

The light

To set you free

And open

Your eyes

To your

Absolute destiny

So, don’t settle

For somebody

Stay in wait

For your

Perfect

One

 

Trajectory

Trajectory

Lost

Four years ago

In a dash

Across the country

Momma dying

Can’t recover

Reaching for the phone

To hear her voice

Text stream

She’ll never

Respond again

Trajectory

In slow motion

Time stands still

Sludge

Nothing is the same

Baby blues

Missed laughter

July pain

Grief swells

Without warning

Unconscious realization

Four years ago

In a dash

Across country

I lost

My trajectory

And time

Has stood still

I will never

Be the same again

But that whisper

Tickles

My brain

That becomes a

Scream

A rage

You

Will

When

You’re

Ready

Trajectory

I miss her

Every

Single

Day

Trajectory

Sliding

You died on a Monday
I wrote your eulogy nine times
She left with you
Things will never be the same again
Rusty sorrow
Grief creeps in unexpectedly
A ship at sea
Uncertain how to navigate
My now
Let alone my tomorrow
We’re here
Left missing
Poor communication
Slippery slopes
Where do we go from here?
I want you to fight
For me
For you
Broken glass azure blue
I need you
Wall so tall
We forget what once was and simply….
Slide
Unknown
You are still here— fight
Be all that you can be for your love of him
And what was
Now
You’re here now
Find your joy
Find your peace
Find your happy
I wait
For you
Missing him
Missing you
Sliding….

Your Mission

Wind blows

Legs pumping, swinging higher

With every push and pull

Snakes slither in the grass

Under your feet

Cotton whisks by in the wind like stars

Your mission accepted

Battle star galactic, a star ship officer

A princess

A Jedi

A secret ninja

Cotton puff lands on the tip of your nose

Tickles, sneezes and laughter

Time was so easy then

Not a care in the world

Except facing make believe giants

Wondering what was for dinner

The swing is rusty now

Dangling and broken on one side

The snakes are long gone

And the wind has stopped blowing

The stars wink in the stillness of the night

Beckoning

What is your mission now?